A recent #Bloganuary prompt was to list five things I’m grateful for today. Unless you’re a new reader on this blog, you know that this is a topic I’ve written about quite a bit in the last year and a half, so this is not a hard topic and one I find easy to write about.
Since the prompt is specifically about today, I will focus on how I’m feeling this afternoon as I think about this.
- I’m thankful I’m here to participate in my daughter’s wedding plans, and particularly shopping for her wedding dress. As overwhelming and frustrating as that experience can be, I’m grateful that she wants me there and that I live here so that I can be and help her. With two shopping appointments down and one to go, we don’t know if we’ve found “the one” yet but I do know that no matter which one she says “yes” to she’s going to look beautiful on her wedding day.
- I love the little nest I’ve called home for the last 16 months. It’s been my safe haven, as well as my home office, my nature retreat, my test kitchen, my yoga studio, and a place to entertain. It’s everything I need and it came into my life right when I needed it. Every once in a while I think about moving into something bigger, maybe something just big enough for two, but I don’t think it’s time to leave the nest yet.
- I’m thankful for the milder weather here in Greenville, even though there have been days in the last few weeks that felt like I was still living further north. There’s still traces of our last snow but fortunately the last storm that pounded the east coast did not come through here. It’s just cold enough for me to wear the boots I spent so much time polishing the other day. 🙂
- I’m thankful that over the years I’ve learned to manage my money. My past history with money was the cause of a lot of anguish and disagreements in both marriages, but I’ve certainly learned some hard lessons. I picked up a few tricks from my last ex so I am thankful for that.
- I’m grateful for everything that I’ve lived through that’s brought me to this place. And by “place” I don’t just mean the physical space but my emotional and mental state of mind. I feel stronger and more confident, with a better capacity to rebound. I was thinking the other day about something my ex wrote to me before I moved. He wrote that whenever I found my soul master he would be there to tell him what a beauty he’d found. I think I’ve already written about the “soul master” concept. I’m not sure I believe that there is such a person, but the person that I am this day in January 2022 doesn’t think I need him or anyone else to speak for me or sing my praises.
Which brings me to a bonus entry for this list: I’m grateful for S and our relationship. It’s been almost a year already since we met and started going out. Sometimes it feels like we just met, and then there will be days when I feel like we’ve been together a very long time. I don’t know what the future holds for us and maybe that makes me appreciate each day and night we get to spend together even more. We’re still treading cautiously because we don’t want to move too fast, and yet we wonder…. why not?
I love this post and the fact that you are happy where you are today and appreciating the journey you are on. My comment is about the term that you were given by you ex regarding “soul master”. That is a telling comment that speaks to control. No one can control a soul – not yours or mine – or anyone’s. To feel that someone could control a soul indicates (in my opinion) that said someone puts themselves on a very high pedestal. I much prefer the term “soul mate” – someone who will be by your side no matter the storm, will navigate when you are not able, but will gladly return control over to you when the storm passes. I agree with your follow up comment that you do not believe that you need anyone to tell someone what a “beauty” they have found in you. Good for you! You’re coming into your own and releasing yourself from the spell you were under. Hugs to you; I’m happy for you.
Thank you! To be fair, the idea of a “soul master” didn’t come from him… he said he read it in Elizabeth Gilbert’s work where she compared soulmates to soul masters. Although when I looked it up she wrote “spiritual master.” Interesting but I’m not sure I buy either concept. There has to be more than one person out there for you, don’t you think? But yes, I agree with much of what you say here.