We’ve all done it.

I don’t like admitting it, but I’ve done my share.

I like to make myself feel better about it by telling myself that the people I talked about had brought it on themselves. They had done something bad to be talked about in whispers and conversations behind their backs.

It feels a little bit like the shoe is on the other foot now, even though I know that I have done nothing to be talked about and discussed by other people (neither of us has done anything wrong). Except of course that I’ve opened myself (and others) up for discussion by writing about my life here.

I’ve been writing about very personal topics that strangers, or acquaintances, or people I work with, don’t need to know. I think I’ve been able to hold back things that are too personal or that are more about someone else instead of me. But I do worry that I’ve crossed that line sometimes.

Writing is a cathartic exercise for me. It helps me express what I’m feeling and going through, whether it’s something happy and marvelous, or a sad and lonely day, and that expression helps me process the feelings. Sometimes that takes the form of a poem. Other times it’s a story; a work of fiction. And then there are the posts like this one that just seem to meander before they get to the real point (assuming they ever get there).

If you’re reading this and you know me because you work with me, it’s OK to let me know you read this. A kind word of support and encouragement goes a long way to making me feel like I’m on the right track. I am grateful that you took the time to reach out to me. I hope I don’t scare you off if it looks like I’m about to cry, or if I actually do start to cry. You haven’t upset me. It’s my response to any spoken, or yes written, acknowledgement of my current situation. It’s a response that I’m trying to change, really I am. I think I’m one of those hyper-sensitive people and that’s why I cry so easily. I find it hard to write sometimes because the tears block my vision. It’s a real problem! It’s quite embarrassing. But I digress. If you don’t want to take the risk of having to see my tears, leave a comment, or send me an email or IM.

But I would rather you talk to me than tell someone else about what you learned about my private life, or have you go around trying to see what other tidbit you can gather. Hey, maybe I left out the good stuff and somebody else can you fill you in! Gossip is ugly and it hurts. We can do better than that. I want to be better than that.

Don’t go fishing for information or broadcast your own theories. If you decide to reach out do so with good intentions. Be supportive. Say a kind word or two and mean it.

My inbox and phone are ready to accept all positive and friendly messages, but it will block out all negativity and bad vibes. Be kind, not just to me, but to everyone. We could all use a little more kindness in our lives. And remember what Thumper taught us:

“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.”

Thumper
Bambi