I’m ashamed and embarrassed to admit this, but I haven’t always been a good friend. In fact, I’ve let a friendship go and essentially killed it.
The friendship I’m referring to goes back to my high school days. I’ve never had a large circle of friends. There were quite a few kids I was friendly with, but my circle of friends was fairly small. These girls and I went to the beach together, had sleepovers, went to the movies together, cooked for each other. Some of them were outgoing and had lots of other friends, some were athletic and played sports, some were brainy and quiet. But one thing we had in common throughout high school was that we didn’t have boyfriends, or dated much at all for that matter.
After graduation some of us went to college in the States, others stayed behind. I was one of those who stayed home for the first two years, choosing to attend the local junior college for my first couple of years. (Actually I don’t know that it was a choice; it was probably what my parents could afford at the time.) Anyway, those of us left behind continued to spend time together. I grew closer to one of these girls (let’s call her H).
I’m not the easiest person to get to know. I tend to hold my feelings in and I don’t share everything that’s going on in my head, or my heart. But for whatever reason, it was easier to do this with H. One of our favorite pastimes was talking about guys: who we had crushes on or who we thought was cute. I also loved arguing with her. She had strong opinions and I used to enjoy playing devil’s advocate just to see where the discussion went.
After I put in my two years at the junior college, it was time to go finish my education and I ended up in Virginia. As luck would have it, I was reunited there with two of the girls from my high school circle. Of course, I also met lots of new people and my circle of friends slowly got bigger. This circle now included guys: guys with dating potential.
And this was the beginning of the end; when I pretty much killed my friendship with H. But probably not in the way you might expect.
To be continued…